You’re at a concert crammed between a sweaty dude in cutoffs whose ripe armpits just happen to perfectly line up with the flares of your nostrils, a couple who are basically using your back as a bed and a group of kids sporting some seriously dilated pupils trying to talk, or rather screech, their friend down from a really bad trip. You’ve been standing for hours, your shins screaming and your toes wiggling, desperately gripping on to the last few oxygenated blood cells hanging on ... [Read more]
Today, while hiding in a stock room reading a copy of Grey's Anatomy, I got to pondering celebrity body parts. No, not like that, take your mind out of the gutter, Toastie. I mean iconic body parts, like Kirk (and Michael) Douglas's dimple, Carl Malden's famous "ass nose", Stephen Hawking's prosthetic larynx, and Shirley Temple's precious curls. I began wondering how today's celebrities would look if they had a couple of iconic celebrity body parts attached to them. After about oh, half a second... [Read more]
Well Fing Fang Foom, one of the most lovable little vocalists of one of the most loveable little bands of all time died this week and the whole world wept. Davy Jones of 60s bubblegum pop band The Monkees, passed away of a heart attack, having complained of chest pains the previous night at his home in Florida. Expect an avalanche of "Last Train to Clarksville" and "Daydream Bereaver" tweets today, as well as #DavyJonesRIP; Jones really was idolized by music fans, despite The Monkees originally ... [Read more]
Steve Jobs, the recently deceased/besmirched tech mogul who once reputedly "declared war" on Android and said that he felt "personally betrayed" by Google, is in for another kicking. This time, Taiwanese comedian and impersonator Ah-Ken has dragged Jobs' memory through the mud in a YouTube advert for Action Electronics’ Android-based ActionPad tablet and multi-language dictionary. Ah-Ken appears in the commercial dressed in the unmistakable Jobs garb of black polo neck sweater and jeans, with ad... [Read more]
Tongues are wagging at the FA headquarters this week, as England boss Fabio Capello resigned amind the John Terry racism controversy and the subsequent stripping of his captaincy. The favourite for the job is Harry Redknapp - a man who just got off with a tax evasion charge and who by his own admission cannot write - thereby cementing England's image abroad as a boorish, lying nation who prefer drinking themselves into oblivion and battering their opponents into a bloody pulp while claiming to b... [Read more]
I was recently passing judgement on people more successful and attractive than myself (as you do) when the conversation (with myself; I have no friends) turned to Rap bands and "plastic" rappers. Plastic rappers being rappers who either:
i) Talk the talk but don't walk the walk.
ii) Walk the walk but don't talk the talk.
iii) Suck. Period.
I came up with quite a list of lame-ohs, some of which you'll know, some you may not (but will be secretly listening to on YouTube for years to com... [Read more]
Around New Years each year I’m reminded of my impending mortality. I feel like 20-somethings today exist in a sort of purgatory between college and settling down where they’re trying to clutch onto their carefree, waning past with roots firmly planted in a 9 to 5. And I mean I’m practically on the brink of 30.
It’s a time where your drink of choice abruptly transitions from Keystone light to red wine but you still feel the need to prove that you can chug like a pro. Where a raging night out ... [Read more]
For all those Mad Men fans out there, did you know Jon Hamm does comedy? After four seasons as the impenetrable Don Draper it was a surprise to see Hamm exploring his comic side on episodes of Saturday Night Live and scene-stealing recently in the big screen hit Bridesmaids. Universal execs liked the money they made off Bridesmaids so much that they’ve green-lighted another film by director Paul Feig and producer Judd Aptow who are rumored to be considering Hamm for a role. Check out Ha... [Read more]