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The Weekly Toast 11/25/11

November 25, 2011

THIS WEEK:

Jagger’s little secret…the holiday spirit rears its ugly head…rise of the bunnymen…

• The Rolling Stones inched one step closer to reuniting for a 50th anniversary tour when Mick Jagger and Keith Richards agreed to meet to iron out the wrinkles that surfaced when Richards openly discussed Jagger’s Little Red Rooster in his bestselling autobiography.

• A member of the University of York’s Department of Archeology argued that graffiti produced by the Sex Pistols John Lydon deserved to be named a National Landmark and compared Lydon’s sketches to early Beatles recordings discovered by the BBC. John Lennon and George Harrison turned in their graves upon seeing the crude caveman drawings online.

• The Roots’ ?uestlove pulled the rug out from under Jimmy Fallon’s chances of ever hosting another political candidate when they played Lyin A** B*tch during Michele Bachmann’s visit to the show.

• Following his massive success with the fictionalized rise of Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, Academy Award-winning writer Aaron Sorkin is contemplating a go at Steve Jobs, perhaps depicting the maniacal, back-biting tyrant he was in real life.

• Aside from being roundly panned as a terrifically boring cinematic experience, the latest film in the Twilight saga may also cause seizures.

• The Internet continued its trick of making not funny things funny again with a meme dedicated to the Pepper Spray Cop. http://peppersprayingcop.tumblr.com/ In homage to Pepper Spray Cop, one Black Friday shopper assaulted over 20 people at a Los Angeles Walmart.

• Scientists managed to create the first bionic rabbit when they fitted lab bunnies with LED contact lenses. The rabbits were able to wear the contact lenses without retinal burning for up to 20 minutes which proved insufficient time to overthrow the scientists.

• Harry Potter stars Daniel Radcliffe and Emily Watson have surfaced in their first post-Potter fare, still being stalked by ghosts, Harry in The Woman in Black and Hermione in My Week With Marilyn.

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